For a moment, I was thinking I’d write today about how much I miss Ireland, about how I’m mentally unprepared to go back to work tomorrow, and about how I’ve already broken all of the New Years’ resolutions that I have yet to make.  They are, of course, the same ones that carry over from year to year:

1. Eat in.  Learn to cook.

2.  Sign up for those French classes you ditched last year.  And the year before…

3.  Simplify.  Don’t over commit.  Learn to say no.

4.  Open your mail.

5.  Save.  No, like really.

6.  Get more sleep.

7.  Get out of the house.

8.  Leave work at the office.

9.  Stop procrastinating.

10.  Keep in touch.

But then I thought… WHY BOTHER? Life is short.

I met a boy.

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Hi Y’all,

SF Single Girl is taking a much needed break.

I shall return.

-SFSG

Aquarius

Have you ever wondered whether, or to what extent, your compatibility with another person is influenced by the stars? I never used to believe in astrology.  I’m still not sure that I do.   Today, generally I think, “I’m cool with a little mystery.”   It’s more interesting to not have all of the answers, right? 

Still, when I was young, my motto was “PROVE IT.” 

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October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  I dedicate this particular post to women everywhere, whether single or married, who have been, and are being, abused by their partners.

I confess that from time to time I’d wondered whether at some point in the future, I could ever become one of these women.  Physically and emotionally scarred by someone I love.  Trapped in a cycle of violence.  Scared to ask for help.  Isolated.  Alone.

When I was much younger, I always answered this question in the negative.  Not me.  “It could never be me,” I thought.  I’d kill him first.  If anyone ever laid hands on me, and it looked likely to become a repeat offense, I’d risk jail, I’d pull a Lorena Bobbitt, I’d feed him arsenic with his dinner.  Sometimes the best defense is a good offense.  If anyone was going down, it wasn’t going to be me.

I was naïve.

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A couple years ago, I was having a conversation with a male colleague about dating in San Francisco. I’m sure I was probably bemoaning the lack of eligible single guys in the city.  Eligible could mean different things to different people, but I meant single, not married, straight, educated, and employed.  He was happily married with three kids at the time, but he said he understood my plight.  Self-admittedly an “average” nice-guy, he said that the odds were still overwhelmingly in his favor and that he had no trouble dating in San Francisco before he met his wife.  In his own words…

“IT WAS LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL.”

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Ok, I’ll be the first to admit that I send many, many text messages on a daily basis.  But usually those text messages are curt and to the point:

When I’m running late: “Sorry, be there in 5…”
When I’m running late and feeling guilty: “Sorry, traffic is HORRIBLE!”
When inviting a friend on a last minute outing: “Up for an adventure?”
When lost: “So… where is this place again?”

My messages either don’t require a response, or if they do, the response can be “yes” or “no” or short and to the point. I do NOT use text messaging for deep thoughts, to hold major conversations, to ask questions that require more than a yes or no answer, or to start up relationships. Call me old-fashioned.  Or just old.

In the dating context, I think text messaging has gotten out of hand and should be banned entirely. I propose a system where we actually have to go back to using the phone to… wait for it…

Make PHONE CALLS. Read the rest of this entry »

Being UNATTACHED. At least, that’s according to one survey of 1,000 U.S. participants belonging to online dating community, Zoosk.com.  According to the survey, only 50 percent of men feel the same way. Although I’ve read several articles that say that men actually get more out of marriage than women, I still find those numbers a little hard to believe.  Assuming the survey results contain a morsel of truth, it does beg the question… where do I fall?  Among the 70% who like their single status or among the 30% who prefer being hitched?  I confess I don’t know. Today, I feel like I’m in the 70% group; tomorrow, things could change.

What I do know is that I haven’t even headed up the aisle yet, and I’m wondering if it’s too early to bail.  Are there any mid-thirties Runaway Brides out there?

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Why do nice guys often finish last? With this post, I’m hereby inaugurating an unofficial “Raise a Glass to the Nice Guys in Your Life” Day.  They’ve been shamefully overlooked and I think it’s high time they were given their due.  Believe me, I personally understand the attraction and have given in to temptation more than I care to admit, but bad boys, whether fictional or real, have held sway for far too long.  Isn’t it about time to switch it up?

On Monday night, inspired by the freezing, foggy, bleak weather, I wrapped myself up in blankets and watched Masterpiece Theater’s Wuthering Heights, starring Tom Hardy (of Inception fame) and Andrew Lincoln (from Love Actually).  Hardy plays Heathcliff and Lincoln plays Edgar Linton.  Without going into all the particulars of Emily Brontë’s iconic MASTERPIECE (I suggest you read the book, and then watch it streaming on Netflix), I think I can sum up the production in three simple words:

Porn for Women. Read the rest of this entry »